Just ride the damn bike

"So is this an all mountain bike, or a trail bike, is it more enduro or more cross country?"   I am really getting sick of these questions.  

 What the fuck is a "Trail Bike?"  Wouldn't that be a bike you ride on trails? Aren't all mountain bikes "Trail Bikes" by their nature?  

I'm not gonna ride ALL the mountain, can i get a "most of the mountain" bike? 

Enduro is riding a bike up a hill, and then riding down the hill as fast as you can, which sounds like every bike ride just about every person has done since they've been riding bicycles.

Seriously, stop it. The industry, the magazines, all the forums, are filled with people trying to categorize, and sub categorize, down to genus and species, each goddamn bicycle out there. It's a fucking bicycle.  Ride it.  ride it up the hill, across the hill, and down the hill.  

Average Joe Consumer thinks there is a difference, and as a human, is subject to the human weakness of not wanting to be "behind" or "left out," he wants to be most informed to make the best purchasing decisions. He thinks it matters if the wheel size is one inch larger in diameter, or if the travel is 10 millimeters longer or shorter.  Average Joe Consumer thinks he now needs a bike to climb, then a different bike to ride across the trail, then a third bike to descend.   He thinks "Enduro" is something different than what he's already doing.  

My friend rides his 33 pound 160mm travel bike up a hill, and then down, on the same rides our other friend rides his 27 pound 130mm travel bike, and we all ride together and all have the same amount of fun.  

I know a lady who did the Leadville 100, finished 9th.  She did it on a 26" wheeled bike with flat pedals.  It's the motor, not the bike.  Strong legs and lungs will beat out most technological advantages.  

It's insidious.  The industry knows most people can't have fun doing what they've been doing if they think there is "something better" out there, if there is some advantage that makes climbing easier or bike handling better.  Average Joe Consumer can ride his bike for months and have a great time, but as soon as he hears enough people saying X is better, he starts to doubt his fun, and thinks he needs X.  

Some bikes are better equipped to do certain things better.  I wouldn't ride a hardtail down Porcupine Rim (although i've seen it done), I wouldn't ride a Santa Cruz Superlight 29er downhill in Whistler, and I wouldn't ride a Giant Reign in Bend Oregon.  I wouldn't do any of those things, but they can be done, and have, and it's ok.  

Stop worrying about what kind of bike it is.  Know what you want and need in a bike, find the bike that fits you best and meets your criteria (how much travel, slack or steep geometry, etc) and that is the bike for you.  If you ride it downhill, it's your downhill bike.  If you ride it cross country, it's your cross country bike, and if 

an epic day on Monarch Crest

Captain Lowballs asks if i wanna ride Monarch Crest in Salida.  I stupidly say yes.
Here's the thing about Captain Lowballs:  every ride is a training ride.  To me, mountain biking is about riding, talking, drinking, spending time on your bike with friends, hanging out.  It's a social event on wheels involving sketchy trails and booze.   I know better.  In the past, i've secretly vowed to myself to NEVER EVER AGAIN ride with the good Captain.  And every goddamn time he asks "hey, wanna go ride?" i say "yeah, that would be great!"   I deserve what i get.  like i said, i know better.

We get to Salida, there is a threat of rain, as there usually is.  Turns out, the whole day we had great weather.  We had the trail to ourselves.

He set the pace and we were off.  I hung in there for a good portion of the day, until we sort of took a wrong turn.  It was totally my fault.  I wanted to descend Starvation Creek, he had planned to come down Silver Creek and finish with the Rainbow Trail.   It was his ride, i should have shut my fucking pie hole, but i whined and complained and made him question himself, we took a wrong turn, sort of got lost, pissed him off, and we did indeed end up coming down Starvation Creek, which is a cool fun descent.  We got to the bottom, he was pissed and we were gonna climb back up so we can finish on Rainbow Trail.  I was in no shape, he took off, I lamely followed.

I never caught him, my legs were starting to cramp, i was done, so i decided to turn back and head back to the car and hopefully meet up with him.

Being the directionally challenged idiot that i am, i got lost, had to turn back once or twice, and finally found my way to the highway, headed back to the car.

Got back to the car, the Captain was already there, had just arrived, turns out he was behind me, then in front of me when i took that wrong turn and i was behind him.

I apologized, and made up for it by buying the burgers and beer.  at the end of the day we had a good day, and he still talks to me.

A bit more epic than expected, but a damn good ride.  I swear i will never ever ride with him again, until next time....